Don't burn your bridges

It’s funny when people realize that they messed up, but refuse to apologize. So instead they try every trick in the book to contact you—despite the fact that the friendship as far as you are concerned is finished. I received yet another message from someone who is a classic example of why you should not burn your bridges.

I know life can be unfair so I try to help out people whenever I am able to do so. With that said, I am not a fool and realize that there are certain people in this world that like to take advantage of others so you have to watch out for them. Healthy relationships whether personal or professional are formed on the basis of give and take.

Both parties share the same interests and the relationship thrives upon both parties exchanging ideas, having great discussions, etc. and the only way to keep a relationship going is through communication. Now I understand that we all have busy lives, but it doesn’t take a lot out of your schedule to take a moment to say ‘hi’ in order to keep in touch. However, if the only time you contact someone is if you need something—this is not right for the following reasons:

1.) Violation of the golden rule: The golden rule is to treat others the way you want to be treated. A relationship should be give and take and in order for individuals not to feel like they are being taken advantage of both parties must treat each other with respect. It never ceases to amaze me how many people expect you to drop everything for them when they need something, but disregard the fact that they would not do the same thing for you.

2.) It’s a small world: The world is getting even smaller through the use of social networking sites, conferences, etc. so why risk the reputation of being labeled as a user? Oftentimes, users have a tendency to leave a trail of destruction behind, thus, causing those who are left behind to pick up the pieces to grow bitter. It’s a small world and the chances of meeting people that you both have in common have increased. People talk and although everyone is not going to like you—don’t give them a reason to substantiate their claim.

3.) Missed opportunities: When you contact someone only because you need something, you miss out on building a relationship. It’s fun and enlightening to interact with other people because they often bring another perspective to the table—one you will never discover if you only contact them when you need something.

For the record, I know some may think I wrote this post because I am bitter or out of retaliation and this couldn’t be further from the truth. I don’t harbor grudges because life is too short. Therefore, it is important for people to appreciate each other for who we are and not just what we can provide for one another. Doing so will keep you from burning any bridges that you might need to cross again.